My Trip to see Benny Hinn

My friend Phil and I were students at John Brown University in Siloam Springs, Arkansas around 89 when we were discussing our religious backgrounds. Phil had long blonde hair but grew up Pentecostal Holiness and I was a geeky bearded renegade Baptist that dabbled in Charismania but saw the excesses and scandals of that movement.

We could not get over the fact that people were following this Benny Hinn character. Benny Hinn who denounced owls as satanic, had the spirit of dead TV healer Kathyrn Kuhlman, and looks like a cross between a car salesman and a game show host. Well we decided to check this tele-evangelist clown out ourselves. He was going to appear in Tulsa that weekend so we decided to take a road trip to see Ol’ Benny.

When we finally got in line at the Oral Roberts Auditorium(tele-evangelists begat Tele-evangelists)we saw a whole parking lot full of zombie-like fans. We were waiting in line behind some big woman talking about the miracle of Benny this and that and another group that was rebuking the line because it was going too slow. The devil was surely mad because Saint Benny was there with his Holy Ghost machine gun to blow all opposition away especially the press. They were the devil’s henchmen you know.

Phil and I had to endure hours of bad praise music which was not about God but about what we can get out of God. Finally, Benny, God’s very own messiah-star waved his hands across the aisle and people fell except us. People falling out on the right side and the left side and here we were just looking at amazement. I thought this would make a good sociology or psychological study.

We then left passed the Benny albums, holy relics and pass the fans who talked about how they felt the Spirit uh I mean the spirit of Benny in their lives. Benny left in his private jet with all his bodyguards. Phil and I got the hell out of Tulsa wondering if Jesus was not far behind.

~ by Rich on October 7, 2007.